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Friday, January 19, 2018
Take Time For Yourself
Last Post 7/14/2017 7:48 AM by ShaunaBell. 14 Replies.
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Sal Posts:11
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3/2/2011 12:49 PM
All caregivers at some point must find it hard to continue with the daily responsibilities that come with taking care of a loved one, especially if it is a 24/7 shift. The first order of business must be that you take time out for yourselves on a regular basis. You will burn out. It is important that you get some time off. Seek out other family members or friends. We took care of our in-laws for many years and in order to keep our sanity we quickly discovered we needed time off. Can't stress it enough, take time for yourself.
Kristen Posts:10
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3/3/2011 9:50 AM
I look in on my great aunt everyday. It seems that no one else cares. I would like to take a mini vacation but I get the feeling that to ask someone to check in on her would be a big problem. I wish I would have called the family together a long time ago to discuss her care so that everyone felt that they had a role. I love my aunt very much but I agree Sal, we need time off.
Sam Posts:18
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3/11/2011 9:54 AM
As I am new to the world of care giving I appreciate this bit of wisdom. I feel the burden already and do not want to get to the point of letting my own life slip away from me.
Sal Posts:11
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3/11/2011 3:06 PM
When our family felt that my parents care giving was too much for my sister we made some calls and set up a schedule and included some outside resources. She thanks us to this day for coming to her rescue. She was the type who would never say anything but would have suffered in silence. Caregiving is exhausting and a caregiver does need a break. Jump in, you will feel better about helping out. We never know when the tables could be turned and we might be the one who need rescued or cared for.
homecare101 Posts:7
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3/17/2011 10:26 AM
bottom line is you can't please everyone.
Cat Posts:11
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3/22/2011 10:49 AM
"Ain't" that the truth. Does not matter how hard or what good intentions you have, you will never please everyone. My new motto, Do what I think is right for my family.
Rayswif2 Posts:2
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7/23/2011 2:45 AM
I've been 24/7 caregiver for my husband who has Parkinson's and Dementia for several years. Recently he had an illness that left him unable to help with his care at all. With physical therapy he is beginning to be able to respond enough to make it easier on me to transfer him from his hospital bed to his wheelchair then to his lift chair. We have no family to help. He has a Home Health nurse check on him once a week (to be reduced to once a month after 3 months) and a Home Health Aide to give him a bath once a week, and physical therapy 3 times a week for a few weeks. Other than that I hire someone to sit
with him while I get groceries, etc. and take a few hours to visit with friends twice a week.

I feel overwhelmed at being totally responsibe for his every need--from personal hygeine to every bite he eats and his medication. He sometimes is calm and happy--a hint of his pre-illness self, then at times he is agitated for 24 hours, leaving me without a break to even read a newspaper or catch a nap.

He has been a caring, giving person all his life and I don't want to ever get to the point that I resent caring for him. Any suggestions on how to prevent this?
JC Posts:13
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7/28/2011 4:33 PM

Posted By Rayswif2 on 23 Jul 2011 02:45 AM
I've been 24/7 caregiver for my husband who has Parkinson's and Dementia for several years. Recently he had an illness that left him unable to help with his care at all. With physical therapy he is beginning to be able to respond enough to make it easier on me to transfer him from his hospital bed to his wheelchair then to his lift chair. We have no family to help. He has a Home Health nurse check on him once a week (to be reduced to once a month after 3 months) and a Home Health Aide to give him a bath once a week, and physical therapy 3 times a week for a few weeks. Other than that I hire someone to sit
with him while I get groceries, etc. and take a few hours to visit with friends twice a week.

I feel overwhelmed at being totally responsibe for his every need--from personal hygeine to every bite he eats and his medication. He sometimes is calm and happy--a hint of his pre-illness self, then at times he is agitated for 24 hours, leaving me without a break to even read a newspaper or catch a nap.

He has been a caring, giving person all his life and I don't want to ever get to the point that I resent caring for him. Any suggestions on how to prevent this?


I know how you feel. Been there, done that. It sounds like you know that you need to get some time off. That is most important- take some time off, some "me time", to do something that you enjoy. The resentment did get to me, but I kept picturing Mom as the person I knew her to be and ask God everyday to grant me patience. I read an article when I was browsing Alzheimer's that talked about communicating with an Alzheimer's patient. I wish I would have written it down. But I am sure you can find it or something similar. It talked about keeping your answers simple and positive. Ex; instead of saying, "Don't do that"; say "let's try this". It not only kept the situation from being negative but it made me feel better and kept me from being the negative person. There is a great book (and many others) available from the National Institute on Aging. It is titled "Caring for a Person with Alzheimer's Disease". Log on to their web site and order it for free. I found reading and studying Alzheimer's gave me a better understanding and better patience.
DD Posts:14
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10/21/2011 3:12 PM
with this sandwich generation, never gonna happen. my daughter meets herself coming and going. i try to help her as much as possible but it's hard to get her to take a break and trerat herself. I am going to try puchasing her a manicure or a massage and get her to pamper herslef for a change
Mark Posts:9
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3/23/2012 1:51 PM
Burnout creeps up on you and before you know it your a different person. It is so important to take some time for yourself. Do something you really enjoy. If you know someone in the caregiver business maybe they would appreciate you lending a hand so they can get some time for theirself.
Kristen Posts:10
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5/18/2012 3:44 PM
It helps to have other family near by. I was so down about the amount of time I was spending caring for mom and dad so I called a family meeting and ask for some help. The others said they were not aware of the amount of time I was spending there and we set up a schedule of the various duties. So far working out great!
Kel Posts:3
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4/2/2013 2:19 PM
I was at the end of my rope so to speak and I called my brother who lives in another state and told him that I had to get some time away and asked if he could help me out for just one week. He took some time off and then paid for a mini vacation for me to get away for a couple of days. I not only got recharged but I found that speaking out and asking does not mean that I am not capable of handling things. My brother just assumed that I had everything under control and was very glad that I asked for his help. Never hurts to ask!
JeannineDay Posts:2
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12/5/2016 11:37 PM
Senior respite vacations are the best options.
georgetnez Posts:3
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3/24/2017 5:03 AM
You are right. Some people take too much stress and they become ill. It is important to take care of our self too.
ShaunaBell Posts:2
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7/14/2017 7:48 AM
Yes, It's true. Thank you for reminding this
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